After the Music Ends
by Furry little friend
Summary: After a year and a half I've come back to finish what I'd started. Takari: Here's the gist: When you're miles away from the one you love, relationships become so much harder to maintain and temptation is everywhere. But Kari can make it, can't she?
1. Dancing Without Music

So. Y'all ready to settle down and get with this?  
  
FLF: such a scary long time has gone by since I've done anything here. I know that everyone who threatened to kill me over my procrastination has either dropped off ff.net or just plain forgotten. But recently I've had the insane urge to finish what I'd started.  
  
The voices: Normal people call that determination.  
  
FLF: I call it creepy. Anyway. Please remember as you read this, and I want you to, that this story was originally written when season 02 was in full swing. This fic came into being right when Takari was booming like crazy.  
  
The voices: Ah, the good ol' days.  
  
FLF: Yes. Good times. People were much more giving with their reviews and story ideas were just beginning to enter the dreaded clichés that become harder and harder to avoid. This story wasn't trite when I wrote it. I hope it hasn't become so now. The voices: If it is a cliché, you deserve it.  
  
FLF: Shut up. Nothing's a cliché when you've had this much coffee, so I think I'll be alright.  
  
Last admonition: I mixed up some of the English and Japanese names. Sometimes this is for my own reasons and sometimes because it's been a year and a half. My memory's not that good.  
  
Here I am!  
  
Back at it! Shazam!  
  
For real you see it.  
  
With your own 2 eyes.  
  
FLF, better recognize!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, or any of its characters. All I've got is the flu, the urge to write and an English paper to put off.  
  
Anyway, here's my revision and repost..  
  
Enjoy it, honey.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
"Yes. I'll have her portfolio in by Thursday Mr. Jones." Mrs. Kamiya said hanging up the phone. "Seriously Kari, is this school what you really want? It's been so much work."  
  
"Mom, we've been through this, and I know what I want." I replied. She gave me a sideways look, "I'm sure mom." She sighed because she knew that that ended the debate.  
  
"So have you picked a main stream yet?" Sora asked. Sora was at our house often now. She and Tai always did "projects" together... well so they said... at first I thought it was because Sora got in a fight with her mom. Then I saw them kissing... Tai's lucky I'm a better with secrets than he is...  
  
"Well... I know I got into the dance program...but I'll wait and see if I get into the art one. I mean, if I get into art I think I'll go for it. So many more careers stem from art than dance." I replied "But I'm not limiting myself, I'll still take some dance classes if I can. I always saw it as more of a hobby, though."  
  
"That sounds great, Kari! I mean you may love to dance, but haven't you seen those documentaries on TV where the dancer girls starve themselves? I'd never like to see you like that Kar. Never."  
  
"Well thanks Tai, same to you." I replied with a giggle.  
  
All this excitement and anticipation had led to some humor. I still wondered whether or not I should have applied to HSA, a private high school for the arts. I knew it had a great curriculum for people like me and I wouldn't even have been the first Digidestined who went there. Izzy took technology courses, so I could see him any time I liked. On top of this, HSA shined on a college application. True, my grades were pretty good as it was, but I wanted to go to the best college I could, and so I needed arts... And HSA was the best place to get those arts.  
  
It all sounded so win/win. I mean, why shouldn't I have gone? Nothing was holding me back.  
  
Except for the fact that it was a boarding school. I wasn't really sure if I was ready to not see all my friends for that long a period of time. Not see my family. Tai. He'd taken the news of my going surprisingly well for the overbearing older brother that he was. He'd been so supportive all through the application process, when I'd needed him most. I smiled, he'd always be there for me, and so would all the other Digidestined no matter whether I was with them or not. In the end I stuck by the choice I'd made. Sighing thoughtfully, I picked up the requirement sheet.  
  
HSA Visual Arts- Year one  
  
2 fruit still lives, check.  
  
1 chair still life, check.  
  
2 still lives with more than five objects, check.  
  
3 landscapes of choice, check.  
  
1 painting of a house, check.  
  
1 seascape, check  
  
4 portraits check  
  
3 animals.  
  
"Meko! C'mere kitty, kitty, kitty!"  
  
~*~  
  
"Wow Kari I think that's your best yet!" Mimi squealed, "If you don't get in I'll... I'll... wear baggy jeans and a Korn T-shirt!" Matt gave a quiet "heh" at the thought. All the Digidestined had gathered in front of the HSA conference room to wish me luck. I had brought my final picture of Meko, and they were admiring it.  
  
"I have to say... and I'm not being partial, that's better than most of the student art I've seen in the hallways." Izzy admired.  
  
"Thanks, Izz. You best be watching those hallways soon, you know." I spoke nervously back to him and he flashed me a grin.  
  
"Miss Kamiya? Mr. Jones will see you now." The receptionist said "You may take a friend with you if you'd like." she said smiling to me  
  
"Umm... Who wants to come?"  
  
"Why doesn't TK go?" Sora suggested, nodding at the boy who'd been quiet all morning. That would be perfect. He always had a way of calming me down when I was anxious or upset. And god was I anxious right now.  
  
"That okay?" I asked quietly, giving him an innocent grin.  
  
"Sure." he said sounding very unlike himself. We walked into the room. I was shaking. My stomach was hardly there. TK flashed me a quick smile. It was a fake, but any comfort was good.  
  
"Miss Kamiya, after reviewing your portfolio we have decided to let you go." Mr. Jones. I couldn't believe it. My eyes welled up. I grabbed TK's arm and clung to him tightly.  
  
"From the dance program." he continued  
  
"Huh?" I said looking up through bleary eyes  
  
"Your work is fabulous." Mr. Jones said "and we would like you to focus all your talent into your art. You're going to go places. Your dancing is nice, but there are several out there with equal talent. Where as I haven't seen such talent in the visual for many years."  
  
"So she's in?" TK asked  
  
"Most certainly"  
  
I was in heaven. I hugged TK. I hugged Mr. Jones. This was just a dream come true. "Wait." I laughed, "Isn't there supposed to be a ton of confetti and balloons falling on me?"  
  
"Wait until we get home." TK smiled at me mischievously "Now can you let go of my arm? I can't feel it."  
  
"Sorry." We walked out to where all my other friends sat waiting for the verdict.  
  
"It's a shame." I said in a mournful tone, which was followed by a long pause.  
  
"Oh Kari I'm sorry! It's their loss!" Sora said in a pitiful voice.  
  
"It's a shame" I said again "It would have been quite a laugh to see Mimi in a Korn T-shirt!"  
  
"Not funny!" Tai screamed as he gave me a big bear hug.  
  
"Actually." TK began, smiling.  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
"Enough confetti?" I asked her as she walked in the door of her apartment to meet a frenzy of rainbow dots and silly string so thick that you couldn't see the hand in front of your face.  
  
"No really." She said rolling her eyes, "Oh and TK, thanks for being there." She called as she made her way through the crowd.  
  
"Sure," I called after her, my voice trailing off. Matt turned on the music. I looked around. Wow, I had never realized just how popular Kari was. Most of the grade was crammed into this tiny space; all here to celebrate Kari's going away. Wait a minute. That's what we're celebrating? It just hit me like a rock: I wasn't going to see my best friend for a really long time.  
  
"What's eating you?" Davis asked in a rather rude tone.  
  
"She's going... somewhere far away, Davis, gone... only audible by phone. Only visible by photo. Gone."  
  
"Whoa... wait a sec, TY, Use normal peoples' language..."  
  
"Oh never mind." I said joining the dancing crowd. My eye caught Kari dancing with some kid who was on the soccer team. Not close dancing, but I still felt a ripple up my spine. Damn if I didn't want to punch that little punk. Jealousy was such a killer. Then it occurred to me that a best friend doesn't get jealous over a silly dance.  
  
Suddenly, and much to my relief, a line dance came over the speakers. The room was way too crowded for this sort of thing of course, and by the time the song was over I'd gotten my toe stepped on at least 20 times, but at least nobody was getting to close to Kari.  
  
After all the panting soon-to-be-high-schoolers finished the dance, a slow song came on. The crowd broke up into pairs. Davis asked Kari who looked around desperately to find someone else, but she didn't catch my eye. Girls from my "fan club" crowded around me, but I sat it out. The room was devoid of voices, just music, and the occasional wince of Kari when Davis stepped on her toes. After it ended they turned on something swing. I moved toward Kari, but she already had a swing ensemble planned out with Tai. I was bummed, but it was okay just watching. Kari was a good dancer... a really good dancer... her feet hardly touched the floor. Tai threw her up in the air she had perfect balance. Much to my embarrassment, I found myself unable to keep my eyes off of her.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
"Whew! I'm exhausted! Dancing takes a lot out of you. I'm gonna take a break." I called to Tai. Man TK hadn't lightened up a bit. So I thought maybe a little dancing would lift those spirits...  
  
"Hey you." I said waving a hand in front of his face, "There's a call on line one."  
  
"Huh?" he asked snapping back to earth  
  
"How about a dance?" I asked him  
  
"I... I... I'd love that."  
  
"C'mon then!" I said pulling him onto the dance floor just as the song ended. Matt grinned as he saw us on the floor. It was going to be the last dance of the evening. Then everyone would say goodbye. Goodbye would be hard. I suddenly wished that this last dance with my best friend would go on forever.  
  
"Okay for the last dance we're going to go back in time." Matt said, "The year is 1969. The month is October. The raging war is ending in Vietnam. The world is on a search for peace. meanwhile, the Beatles have two new singles out. One of goes something like this..."  
  
TK looked at me and gestured for me to dance with him. I accepted. I knew Matt must be going somewhere with this, but didn't think much of it. I sighed as TK put his hands around my waist and I placed my arms around his neck. Nearby I saw Tai and Sora dancing closely. The music hadn't even started yet... I guess they didn't need it. I smiled thinking of that. Would I ever be like that with some boy? So in love that I didn't need any music?  
  
I looked up at TK who watched me thoughtfully. Then the music began, but soon faded away. The only things visible to me were TK's sapphire eyes. Then I just sort of fell into his arms. He held me closer... and I started to tear. "I'll miss you."  
  
"You too... more than you can know." His voice in my ear seemed distant somehow.  
  
"How?" I said giving him a mild quizzical look  
  
"Nothing." He blushed and looked down at me smiling. That was the first time I ever realized that something more than friendship radiated from his eyes. I looked down blushing. I lay my head back on his shoulder. Does he care for me like that? It seemed like it... the question was did I care for him like that?  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
We just danced, and for a short while that was our existence; two beings melting for each other, moving to the beat of some song that had long ended. Clearly Kari had asked herself an important question in this time, and answered it too. I just wondered what that answer was. Neither of us aware that a large group had just sat and watched our dance for over an hour smiling (Or in certain cases scowling).  
  
"Um. guys? Do you think we could say goodbye to the guests and THEN you can hold the dance marathon?" Tai teased.  
  
"Oh my god! What time is it?" Kari whispered immediately pulling away.  
  
"11:30" Jyou piped up  
  
"We danced for an hour and a half." I marveled, catching her eye; clearly she was still in shock. Kari said goodbye to everyone. each person individually. until only Sora, Matt, Mimi, Izzy, Jyou and I were left, all the original Digidestined.  
  
"Well goodbye everybody! I've got a HUGE test tomorrow.It's been so good to see you! Goodbye Kari! You'll do great! You've really got some talent, kid." Jyou said  
  
"Bye Jyou! Oh. and you can email me here!" Kari said handing him a piece of paper, "Keep in touch!"  
  
"Bye Kari! See ya tomorrow!" Izzy said walking out the door  
  
"Oh my gosh Kari email me everyday, I wanna hear everything, and I mean everything! Boys too!" Mimi squealed  
  
"You know I tell you everything anyway Mimi! Ooo I miss you already!" Kari replied giving her a hug. Mimi grinned and walked out the door.  
  
"I'll be there to see you off tomorrow Kari, but my mom is gonna want me home now. Love you girl!" Sora called  
  
"Bye Sora!"  
  
"Well this is bye then? I'll see ya over winter break! Bring home some of your work for us" Matt said smiling  
  
"Sure!" Kari replied.  
  
"I mean artwork, not math and stuff."  
  
"I figured." Kari replied faking disappointment as Matt walked away.  
  
"Want a moment alone?" Tai asked Kari and I  
  
"Thanks" I responded.  
  
Kari and I walked into her bedroom and sat down on a beanbag together, she looked at me, "TK, I'll miss you. You're the best friend I've ever had! I'll email you each night!" Kari said trying desperately to keep that perfect composure, but she snapped. She started to cry and I held her close.  
  
"Shhh, don't cry." I cooed starting to well up a bit myself "Kari?"  
  
"Hmmm?" she asked looking up at me. Visions of our childhood days clouded my mind. I realized I'd never have a friendship like that again. And I knew that what I was about to do would jeopardize all of that completely. It suddenly occurred to me that I'd been bottling again. Feelings for Kari- God I must have had them since I met her. Was I nervous? Of course, but this is what I knew I had to do to. If I didn't do this now I might not get another chance, so I had to overcome my fears.  
  
I leaned down and planted a gentle kiss onto her forehead. Then she caressed my cheek with her hand. I was surprised, but she was clearly beckoning me to do what I'd wanted so badly. I lifted her chin with my cupped hand. I leaned down and planted a soft kiss on her lips.  
  
~*~ Kari's POV  
  
Wow. There was my first kiss. For some reason I'd always thought Davis would be the one I'd share this with. Not because I'd want to, but he seemed so much more likely to act on his feelings than TK. But oh, when TK acted on his feelings! Then, part of this moment's wonder resounded from my own bottled feelings, not just the actions of my best friend. Like now, in this kiss, I felt ideas. energy, feelings. Love, passion, love contentment- but still desire. I felt things. a field of wildflowers, a bed of roses, a tropical island, a soft puppy dog, and hot cocoa on a winter's night, I felt love. Love. I felt LOVE. But I couldn't even describe it more than that.  
  
It was new, it was deep. And I was going away tomorrow.  
  
~*~  
  
"Goodbye Kari!" Tai, Sora and TK called to me the next day "Goodbye Izzy!"  
  
"Bye everybody!" I called as the bus drove away.  
  
The bus ride was long, over five hours. But I had a good time. I sat next to Izzy, and he's the best conversationalist you could ever meet. We talked and laughed the whole bus ride. When we arrived at school they told me to go into a huge art room. Izzy and I said goodbye.  
  
"Hi!" said a short, white- blonde girl with a high-pitched voice. "My name's Hanae! I'm a freshman here! Who're you?"  
  
"Hi, my name is Kari! I'm a freshman too." I replied, glad to not be alone.  
  
"Would it be okay if I walked around with you? It'll be good for me to look like I have a friend. I don't know anybody here! Do you? You have to make a good first impression here, so I've heard. It'll be good for me to walk in with someone like you, I mean; you don't need to look like you have friends. You're wearing 'Tachikawa' clothes!"  
  
"Sure... That's great! And if you want any 'Tachikawa' clothes you can borrow them anytime! I have plenty!" I said using my polished social skills. I never knew Mimi's clothing line was so "in"... Makes sense... my friends were always borrowing my clothes... and I got them dirt cheap from Mimi... well I *was* her Guinea Pig...  
  
"Really? My parents could never afford them! Thank you!"  
  
"Really, it's nothing." But it was something. I noticed all the sophomores looking at me approvingly.  
  
"So... Do you know anybody here?" she asked  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Name. Grade. Gender. Subject."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Just tell me. My cousin once went here. I can tell you if your friend can help you socially." She said  
  
"Um... I don't really care about popularity... "  
  
"C'mon Name. Grade. Gender. Subject."  
  
I sighed "Koushiro Izumi, Junior, Male, Computer Technology."  
  
"Lucky!"  
  
"Why do you care so much?" I asked, "In 20 years you won't look back and see who wore name brand clothes, or who had the most followers. The only thing that will matter is how talented you were."  
  
"No, in twenty years there will be a reunion, and people will look at you and say "Oh look there's that hot girl who was so cool she dated a Junior as a freshman." And they'll look at me and say "Who's that scrawny little pipsqueak over there?" She said  
  
"Whoa. Hold it there, partner! DATE? I don't DATE him! I have a boyfriend back home!" my mind fuzzed at the thought of TK.  
  
"Sorry... I'm not normally like this it's just the. everything. excitement?" she apologized  
  
"Okay."  
  
Mr. Jones walked into the room and we all found seats. I ended up sitting next to some guy that Hanae said was "Totally hot" and "Totally checking me out" on one side, and Hanae on the other. "Welcome all! This year we have the honor to welcome in one of the most talented classes we've ever had the pleasure to work with."  
  
"How much ya want to bet he says that every year." the boy sitting next to me whispered. I let out a silent chuckle in reply. Hanae eyed me encouragingly. "We have divided up our freshmen class by strengths and by talent. While some classes might be at a higher level, they also might have different fortes. Do not make assumptions about others' capabilities. Everyone here is talented, of every ten who tried out for this program only one made it. Be proud."  
  
"Wow." I breathed  
  
"Today we will divide you up and give you your schedules, dorms, and roommates."  
  
~*~  
  
It had been a long day. I collapsed into my top-bunk retreat. Beneath me I heard Kaori chatting on the phone with her sister. Kaori was my roommate. I'm sure somebody had gotten a real kick out of that, Kari and Kaori, rooming together. but I didn't have any complaints. Kaori was a nice girl, a bundle of positive energy, but hardly in the same way Hanae was. Anyway, she was one more friend, and we'd hit it off immediately. Plus we were in all the same classes and we both were pretty happy with our schedules.  
  
9:50- 10:40 ~ Landscape 9A: Impressionism in earth  
  
10:45- 11:35 ~ Math in art 9A: Cubism and tessellation  
  
11:40- 12:40 ~ Lunch  
  
12:45- 1:35 ~ Literature 9A: Poetry inspired by art  
  
1:40 -2:30 ~ Still life 9A: Such things have never moved before  
  
2:35- 3:25 ~ Portraits 9A: Capturing the life behind the eyes  
  
3:30- 4:20 ~ Freedom of the brush 9A: Dances with canvas  
  
This year already looked like it would be one of the best yet, even if my whole crew wasn't with me, I had Izzy and two new friends.. I was sure I would make more. I just wished that TK were here too. A long distance relationship was going to be hard, but I knew I could trust TK. I also knew that I was in control, no matter how cute that Ben was. Ben, yeah, he was the one at the assembly, but I didn't think too much of the American. Sure he was nice to look at and to talk to, but I was very happy with what I had.  
  
~*~  
  
Dear Mimi,  
  
Life is beautiful... I miss you though. My friends started to scream when I showed them the last letter you sent me. Do you think you could include more than one signature in the next letter? Jeez Mimi... how do you own a successful clothing line and still do all that schoolwork? It's unbelievable. Hanae's made some new friends, and she fainted when she found out that you asked about her. Kaori's doing great, she thanks you for asking. And for the last time NO I DO *NOT* LIKE BEN!!! Got it? Good. So how's your life been? Write back soon!  
  
Luv ya-  
  
Kari Kamiya  
  
P.S. Did you ever notice that if you scrambled my last name you get "IM A YAK"?  
  
Dear Davis,  
  
I'm doing fine. No I don't feel like coming home each night when I go to 'bed'. I do miss you all though. It's nice to hear from you. You asked about the friends I made? Um... well I'm friends w/ everybody I guess.but uh... well there's Hanae, she's a little hyper, and she's a social climber but she's really nice. And there's Kaori, she's in a lot of my classes, and she's an amazing artist! She's also my roommate. She's cool. And there's Ben. He's really talented too. He is also in a lot of my classes. He has a GREAT sense of humor. He could make you laugh ALL night long! Well um... that covers it! See ya soon!  
  
Smiles,  
  
Kari Kamiya  
  
P.S. Thanks for telling me the last name scramble thing! You must have spent hours on  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
"Hi Davis." I said tonelessly as I saw who was at the door.  
  
"Tiki! .I just got a letter. from Kari!" Davis panted after running all the way to my house.  
  
"So..."  
  
"She's cheating on you!" he said  
  
"Right." I replied sarcastically.  
  
"Right." His eyes were serious.  
  
"No way. Not Kari."  
  
"Oh yeah? Here's a piece of her letter! I was gonna grab the whole thing, but it ripped! I got over here in a rush!"  
  
"Lemme see." I said ripping the piece of paper from his hand. He's pulling something to break us up but why not look? He handed me a scrap of paper. On it, in Kari's perfect handwriting in her favorite pink ink was written:  
  
_________________________________________________  
  
And there's Ben. He's really talented too. He is also in a lot of my classes. He has a GREAT sense of humor. He could make you laugh ALL night long! Well um... that covers it! See ya soon.  
  
Smiles,  
  
Kari Kamiya  
  
___________________________________________________________________  
  
"No..." I said weakly  
  
"Yes... Now I do wonder what type talent she was speaking of..." Davis prodded  
  
"What was the rest of the letter about?" I asked anger burned inside me.  
  
"Now do you REALLY wanna know?" he asked  
  
"No, not really."  
  
"Well are you glad I shared this with you?"  
  
"Glad you showed me? Not really, but I needed to know. Now leave before I take my anger out on you!" I looked down at the note in my hand. I crumpled it and flushed it down the toilet. How could Kari do this to me? I thought we were for real.  
  
~*~ ~*~ ~*~  
  
Anyway, there's chapter one, remixed. Like it or leave it. Just please give me some feedback! 


	2. Look who's on the news

FLF: Hmmm, you want some thoughts?  
  
Voices: Yeah, but you sure don't have any relevant ones.  
  
FLF: Why, of course I have relevant thoughts. Like the other day, I saw a guy with blonde hair named TK. He was hot like July, you best believe. Anyway, I was thinking about that. Very applicable, don't you agree?  
  
Voices: Oh, fur; you're such a girl.  
  
FLF: That sounded very condescending, V... I have my dignity.  
  
Voices: *coughs* you're writing about Digimon.  
  
FLF: Hey mix it around, drop the MO and add TY and what does that spell?  
  
Okay, I actually enjoyed revising this chapter. Weird, I know. But I think it's a goody if you're up for more of my old school Digimon attic recycling.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, blahblahblah..  
  
Here we go.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
"Got a letter from TK!" I called down to the bottom bunk  
  
"Ooo... I'm coming!" Kaori called up happily. It had become a ritual for the two of us to share letters and news tidbits up on the top bunk. Kaori liked how I'd decorated it and I liked the privacy. We both knew from experience that it was very easy to pick the lock to our dorm room. Once I'd been reading her a love letter TK had written to me and one of Ben's friends had barged in, stolen it from my hands and read it aloud for a group of about ten boys outside. I'd been mortified. Of course I had no need to be, TK would always do something really sweet like a love poem, love letter, or even send me a burned CD of all his favorite love songs. It was nothing to hide. It was too adorable, so I always shared it with Kaori. This time the letter was thin, but I didn't care.  
  
"Open it already!" Kaori squeaked  
  
I opened my mouth and began to read.  
  
~*~  
  
Dear Hikari,  
  
There are no coherent words to describe how I feel right now. I'm shocked, pained, angry saddened. How could you do that to me Kari? You had me wrapped around your little finger, ready to take your command at whim... and what do *you* do? You go around doing unseemly things with a boy you hardly know! You thought I wouldn't find out? Well I did and. God Kari, I thought I knew you, but I guess I didn't. All my life I thought you were something that you're clearly not. I fell in love with someone that just doesn't exist. I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive that.  
  
Angry and Confused,  
  
Takeru Takaishi  
  
PS: You *are* a Yak!  
  
~*~  
  
"Kari... I'm so sorry! Oh my god..." Kaori gasped after I read her the letter.  
  
"But what did I do? What? Who?"  
  
"I dunno..." Kaori replied shaking her head sadly.  
  
~*~  
  
The next day I was barely there in Portrait class. I was sad confused lost. In a moment everything that was finally right, the foundation had vanished.  
  
"Very good Miss Berg! Nice expression, full of happiness and joy! We can see the triumph on the girls face as she accepts the award! Brilliant!" Ms. Randolph cried. She was the teacher of this class. Miss Berg was a girl named Bonnie. She was pretty nice, but I didn't know her that well.  
  
"Now, everybody I would like you to look at the painting Miss Kamiya is doing. It differs a lot from her earlier work, no? Look at the pain and determination in the child's teary eyes, as she has just fallen after taking her first steps. Look at the tone of the colors; they have a blue heather tinge to them, don't they? What does this painting signify to you Miss Kamiya?"  
  
"Um... I guess it signifies the fact that the world is full of beautiful moments, but the moment always ends in pain or sorrow. While we always paint the climax of joy, it is also important to capture the moment after, the one where the only thing left is hope, the hope for the joy to return. But if you lose the hope then that becomes you. Without hope also means hopeless." I said. Without TK I had no hope. Hopeless.  
  
"Very deep Miss Kamiya."  
  
I looked around the room silently. Ben looked moved, Kaori stared at me, and Hanae fiddled with a strand of her hair. Everyone else just blinked, but soon the moment was over. We all continued painting until the bell rang.  
  
After I left the classroom Ben walked up to me and said, "That was really amazing, what you said in class. It really made me think. There's a lot more to you than a lot of those girls. They're here to impress people with their talent, you've got more of it than they do, but your art always says something. And then you say something just as eloquent. It really is amazing Kari."  
  
"Thanks, and there must be something different about you too. Most people didn't understand what I was getting at."  
  
"Thank you," he said blushing. It then occurred to me that what Hanae had said to me on the first day was true. He did like me... I had TK though... I sighed. What had I done? I was over thinking it. I let my mind drift. It had suddenly occurred to me also that I was becoming slightly drawn to Ben's high level of comprehension and great sense of humor, but as suddenly as the thought grazed my mind I shooed it away. I was in love with TK and acting for a moment, like anything with Ben would be, was wrong.  
  
"I'll see you in Still Life!"  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
The life inside me was dwindling... I shouldn't have let her get to me so much. Just one kiss- a life of feeling. I needed to get a grip.  
  
"TK! You got something from Kari!" Mom called  
  
"Throw it away."  
  
"Look honey I know you're mad, but she's been calling you over and over and you've ignored all that. Just read the letter. It can't hurt."  
  
"Fine. But if it makes upset, even a little, you leave me alone about this."  
  
"Done." Mom said. She really thought I would like the letter. I guess she just doesn't know what a bitch Kari is....  
  
Reluctantly, I opened the envelope. It was on pretty cream-colored stationary in her favorite pink ink and perfect handwriting. This normally made me smile, but now it made me want to puke. It read:  
  
Dear Takeru,  
  
What is love?  
  
Love's all what's light!  
  
What gets you through  
  
The black of night!  
  
Love is life!  
  
I live to love you  
  
Live to kiss you,  
  
Live to hug you.  
  
Life is love and love is you  
  
Without your love  
  
What do I do?  
  
It is your love that gets me through.  
  
The only thing I know that's true.  
  
When loneliness  
  
Comes creeping 'round.  
  
I'll go wherever love is found.  
  
And when I'm down  
  
And when I'm out  
  
Your love is what I think about.  
  
It is the very spoon that feeds me-  
  
Someone loves me,  
  
Someone needs me.  
  
But now what is there that awaits me?  
  
The one I love thoroughly hates me.  
  
And no one even told me why!  
  
There's no solace in the tears I cry.  
  
Life is love and love is you,  
  
Please tell me, love, what did I do?  
  
Love? Hikari Kamiya  
  
~*~  
  
I was startled. So she loved me? And she didn't know what I meant? She could be lying. Or Davis could be lying... Definitely more likely... How did I ever fall into a trap like that?  
  
~*~ Kari's POV  
  
"Good afternoon class!" Mr. Etchski called  
  
"Good afternoon Sensei!"  
  
It was freedom of the brush, Kari's. and well, just about everyone's favorite class. You got fifty minutes to just stand and paint. Kari picked up her brush and started to paint, when Ben accidentally bumped up into her. His back was to hers the way the easels were set up today. He had simply stepped away to look at his painting.  
  
"I'm so sorry! I didn't realize you were there!" He said sounding genuine and nervous at the same time.  
  
"It's all good. This picture looks better abstract anyway!" I said looking at the blob he had caused. I smiled reassuringly.  
  
"Yeah if you put a little red over here, and a little purple over here!" He said sounding relieved that I was okay.  
  
I went to put my brush back on the paper and continued almost painting myself out of the cruel reality. About fifteen minutes before class ended I felt a tremor. There was going to be an earthquake, I could feel it coming. I had experienced one before because they came so often in Japan. Something my 7th grade earth science teacher rambled on about plate tectonic boundaries converging or something... I had forgotten all the precautions... or what to do... "GET DOWN KARI!" Ben yelled as a big easel was about to crash down on me, but before it could, he pushed me out of the way so that he landed on top of me instead. He held me tightly to him and took the blow of whatever came our way. The earth thrashed violently up and down. People were screaming. People were getting hurt. Then as quickly as the quake came, it went.  
  
~*~  
  
I was unharmed, but Ben wasn't he had a gash across his back and a bruise on his cheek. He was still holding me. I couldn't move out of shock. About 10 minutes later he gained the strength to talk.  
  
"So, aren't you going to thank me?" he asked  
  
"How would you like to be thanked?" I replied  
  
"Like this." he said then he leaned down and kissed me gently on the lips, and I simply couldn't deny feeling. But of course it hadn't been true feeling. It was the emotions bottled from all the stress with TK, the fright of the earthquake, the gratitude toward him for my life and of course the sensation of being kissed again. I pulled away suddenly burdened by the weight of what I'd just done. I'd just done something very wrong.  
  
"Thanked?" I said trying my very hardest not to sound aggravated. How could he do that? He knew I had a boyfriend... No... He didn't How stupid am I? I knew he liked me, but I never ever slipped TK's name into conversation. I cursed my own stupidity.  
  
"Yes." He replied sullenly. He knew he was upset. I felt bad. I would never hurt someone like him, especially after they had just saved my life. He didn't know why I had rejected him. I wouldn't tell him right now, it was too much. Then I noticed the camera sitting on the ceiling and it triggered a memory. About five years ago there had been a bad earthquake here, in this area of Japan. They had put footage from these cameras on the news. I remembered hearing about HSA and seeing this art room. The news throughout Japan... tonight TK would see me kiss another guy.  
  
"The news." I whispered  
  
"Oh well..." Ben said bitterly clearly remembering this too, "At least my twin brother will swoon with envy as he sees me kiss a girl ten times better than he ever could. Just so long as they don't zoom in and show how disgusted you were."  
  
"I'm sorry... It wasn't you... it's just..." I started to cry.  
  
~*~ Ben's POV  
  
Jesus. Did she have to cry? Wasn't it bad enough for me to be rejected? Maybe I did something wrong, but what? Oh, such a pity to see a beautiful girl like her crying. I shouldn't feel guilty, should I? I touched her lightly on the shoulder, she tried to flash me an, 'its okay' smile but failed miserably. A few minutes later she ran out of the art room screaming "Izzy!" I was confused. Who was Izzy?  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
"Izzy!" I yelled. I was happy to have an excuse to run away. I definitely needed time to think. I scrambled up the steps to the computer lab. "Izzy!" I yelled. The room was a wreck. It wasn't as safety proofed as the art room. I had to lift up some debris until I found him. He was badly injured. Izzy looked up at me.  
  
"K.K.ari?" Izzy whispered from lack of strength. "Are... y...ou O...K?"  
  
"I'm fine. It's you I should worry about." I said trying to pull him out of the rubble. I wasn't strong enough. I needed help. None of the students in that room all looked pretty winded. I had get Ben.  
  
"I'll be back with help! Don't worry!"  
  
I ran all the way down the steps, stumbling on a few. I ran until I skidded to a halt at the door to the art room.  
  
"Ben" I gasped, "I need your help."  
  
~*~  
  
Ben's POV  
  
I had half a mind not to help her, but she looked really scared and really weak. She also looked sorry. "No need to think twice!" I said smiling wryly at her. I hope she appreciates this...  
  
~*~ Kari's POV  
  
We ran up the steps together, I led him to the computer lab.  
  
"You're back..." I heard Izzy mumble  
  
"C'mon! Help me pull him out!" I called to Ben who positioned himself at Izzy's other arm.  
  
"1...2...3..." we called. On three Izzy was out from under a table where he'd been stuck. He looked pretty much okay, just scratched, bruised and battered. His ankle, however, was lying in a weird limp position, and was covered in blood. We sat there with him for a couple of hours, not saying anything to one another.  
  
"Izzy? How's your ankle?" I said leaning down to him  
  
"A little better. Thanks. I owe you one." He said  
  
"I'll be counting." I said giving him a cockeyed grin. "Also, thank Ben. I couldn't have helped without him!" Ben nodded his head to Izzy in a silent "you're welcome"  
  
I gave Izzy a quick hug and asked, "Will you be okay?"  
  
"Yeah. I should be fine. I owe you my life."  
  
"Hey! You've saved my neck before, it was the least I could do!"  
  
~*~  
  
After all the events of the day I just went back to my room and collapsed into my bed, which I was grateful to see had survived. I didn't even remember about the camera. I hardly remembered the kiss. It seemed ages ago. I simply was turning on the TV to see if it worked when I saw an anchorwoman walk into the newsroom, pressing down the wrinkles in her skirt and begin to speak. I suddenly remembered.  
  
"One of our top stories tonight is the 7.6 earthquake in Sapporo. They are still counting the casualties. We have been blessed with some footage of this quake, courtesy of HSA."  
  
I saw the high school art room. I saw Ben jump and knock me away from danger. I saw him take all the blows, and the fate that people who didn't have saviors met.  
  
"And amongst tragedy lurks romance." They zoomed in on his kiss to me. "For love blossoms where terror strikes."  
  
I nearly died. I punched the TV off. I punched every pillow in the room. I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw an Instant Message sitting on the computer. It was from Mimi. I sat down. She had to hear this right.  
  
PinkPassion562: Hey Kari!  
  
NoAngel45: Hey Mimi  
  
PinkPassion562: Don't like Ben eh? well we ALL saw u 2 on TV!  
  
NoAngel45: WHAT? You live in AMERICA!  
  
PinkPassion562: So? We got the footage too!  
  
NoAngel45: My life is over  
  
PinkPassion562: How's that? *I* think it's wonderful!  
  
NoAngel45: But I have a boyfriend  
  
PinkPassion562: Gots ta be a playa, girl!  
  
NoAngel45: Now Mimi, you know that's not my style. Do you know about TK?  
  
PinkPassion562: Um... well he was really proud of that voodoo doll he made of you...  
  
NoAngel45: He made a Voodoo doll of me?  
  
PinkPassion562: Yeah... you, Ben, and umm. Gerald Ford.  
  
NoAngel45: Okay, I can understand Ben and I. but Gerald Ford?  
  
PinkPassion562: *shrugs* Well I guess if you're going to make Voodoo dolls you make them all at once. The point is no matter how many times he bashed your doll against a wall, or stuck a needle through its heart, he still cuddled it close to him and cried. I mean, Kari, I don't think you've got anything to worry about, he's head over heels. I'm sure if you explain he'll cool down.  
  
NoAngel45: Somehow I don't feel like it. I think I was on my last chance.  
  
NoAngel45: Oh, and ummm just curious is all. but what about Gerald?  
  
PinkPassion562: I didn't really want to know- I didn't ask  
  
NoAngel45: ask who?  
  
PinkPassion562: Matt.  
  
NoAngel45: Oh. Tell Matt that I would never hurt TK; tell him it wasn't anything, the kiss. I don't want him to hate me Mimi. Does everyone hate me?  
  
PinkPassion562: Oh Kari, we could never hate you.  
  
NoAngel45: Yeah. Alright Mimi, this has been enough excitement for one night. I think I need some rest.  
  
PinkPassion562: Okay, get some sleep, Kar.  
  
NoAngel45: I'll try night Mimi.  
  
NoAngel45 has logged off  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
"TAKE THAT!" I yelled hurling Voodoo Kari into a wall. Normally this made me feel better, but not today. I picked her up and looked at her. She looked a lot like the real Kari. Maybe *I* should go to this artsy-fartsy- hell-hole if I can catch her likeness so easily... Maybe it's just because it's Kari's face that's imbedded in my heart.  
  
"Alright Gerry, you're next." I called  
  
I stopped for a moment as I heard my mom talking on the phone in the next room. "Yes, Emmy, I think he's flipped his lid. He's making Voodoo dolls, wearing black, and plotting deaths to his "Worthy foes". Depression is an understatement. I think he's gone crazy." And Maybe I was going crazy...  
  
"And he's always mumbling about how Kari ruined his life. Yeah........................... She goes to Carver.......... She was the girl on TV................ Yes, the one who was kissing that boy............ Stunningly pretty, I know............. Yeah.....They dated................ I dunno......... He's been through this crap with her all year........... I still think there's something more to this................. Well she always seemed so sweet.................... And she wrote the most beautiful poem for him................. I hate to think she could do this...................."  
  
I hated to think it too... In her hand she had my heart. If it wasn't there then it was gone.  
  
~*~  
  
Kaori's POV  
  
"Yes, Hanae. I want you to taunt them about being a couple." I said  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I know them. He'll ask her why she won't accept it, why she hates him. She'll blab about how great TK is. It's sure-fire!" I said. I wanted Kari to be happy. "I don't know TK, but I do know that he was totally hurt. I also know that he loves Kari. A lot. And she loves him more than anything." It was the truth, you'd know it too if your roommate spent all night mumbling about her ex-boyfriend and you hadn't slept fully in weeks.  
  
"If you say so..."  
  
"I do." I replied.  
  
"But how'll TK hear this, how does this help... anything?"  
  
"That is where my lil' extended timing Yak Back comes in!" I said  
  
"Stroke of genius, Kaori!"  
  
"As always!" I grinned sleepily  
  
Life would all work out... eventually... Right now all I knew was that I needed sleep.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
I wanted to crawl back into bed. I heard all sorts of taunts about Ben and I being a couple. I hated it. Just then, Hanae walked up to me grinning broadly, "Well how's it going with you two lovebirds?" I fumed. I heard Ben walk up and tap me on the shoulder. I was going to let him have it. I opened my mouth and spilled my heart out.  
  
~*~  
  
Kaori's POV  
  
Wow... I knew Kari would fill him in, but that was amazing! And I got it all on my Yak Back. I took out the tape and pulled out a piece of stationary and wrote.  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
"TK you got a letter from HSA!" Mom called. When would she learn?  
  
"Toss it to the termites"  
  
"It's not from Kari! It's from a girl named Kaori."  
  
"No!" I yelled. What an obvious alias.  
  
"Fine. It's a package. I'll leave it on your desk." Mom said. I tried ignoring it and not falling into this obvious trap, but I gave in.  
  
On top there was a letter that read:  
  
Dear Takeru Takaishi,  
  
You saw the kiss. I saw the kiss. The world saw the kiss. The fact is that YOU don't have a roommate who cries "Takeru" all night. I am not getting enough sleep. Getting you two back together is to my greater interest, so I hatched a plan. I asked my friend Hanae to taunt Kari while Ben was nearby. The results are on the tape inside the box. I think you might find it touching. If you don't listen to it I'll easily tell and as a 'reward' I will send you one of the extremely disturbed paintings that are a result of my lack of sleep. As you know Kari is an awful liar. That is enough proof that this is not staged. This has not been tampered with in the least. Choose to believe me. It will be worth it.  
  
Sleepless wonder,  
  
Kaori  
  
PS: Kari is *not* a Yak  
  
I couldn't help it. I had to hear the tape. I had a feeling inside me that even if it was staged Kari wouldn't go to the trouble if she didn't care, right? I put it into the old tape player and listened.  
  
"Operation bedtime has begun" I heard a whisper.  
  
"You OK?" I heard a male voice say. Ben's I assumed.  
  
"NO. Everyone thinks we're a couple. I can't take it!" It was Kari, and she was pissed.  
  
"So?" he asked, "What's so bad about that? I mean even if we're not..."  
  
"All Japan thinks we're an item." Kari snapped  
  
"So?" Ben sputtered  
  
"THE WHOLE GODDAMN WORLD THINKS I DATE YOU!" Kari yelled. That must have turned some heads in the hallways. I didn't think I had ever heard Kari so angry.  
  
"So? Am I that hideous? Obnoxious? Or just... BLAH? Even if so... is it so bad for the world to believe that in a tragedy-struck place love thrives? That even in agony others are not forgotten? Is it so bad to let out that image? Let out the image that a guy like me could score a girl like you?" Ben said now beginning to fume himself.  
  
"Well it's all good except that somewhere in this crazy world lives a boy named Takeru Takaishi. A boy who turned a three minute slow-dance into an hour and a half trip to a place created it's own music. A boy who gave me my first kiss. A boy who waited over six years for me to fall for him. A boy who loves me in a way beyond your comprehension because we share a bond that we can never prove to you. A boy who holds my heart, and even after seeing it deceive him, he keeps it safe. A boy with whom I would trust my soul. A boy who not only claims the title of 'Love of My Life' but the one of 'Best Friend' because he was since we first met at age eight."  
  
Her voice turned bitter "A boy who now owns a Voodoo doll of me, and one of you. He punches mine and hurls it around, but then holds it close because I hold his heart, and I have not been so careful with it as he has with mine. And what the hell do I care if six million people see something that warms their hearts while all the while it is a lie? What do I care? If the only person who I will ever be my first true love throws my heart out the window? I'll tell you what. Nothing because I'll have no heart. Is that what you want? Because that is what has happened!" I heard her throw down her books and run away.  
  
~*~  
  
Yes, I realize how absolutely unrealistic that chapter was. That's why it's called fiction.  
  
Review? 


	3. Like Pink Fleece In the Wind

FLF: Well, I saw that TK guy again.  
  
Voices: and?  
  
FLF: Now he's my bitch.  
  
Voices: He was a cartoon, wasn't he?  
  
FLF: no.  
  
Voices: Yes.  
  
FLF: Fine. He's still my bitch.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon; I just make a hobby of acting like I do.  
  
~*~ Kari's POV  
  
Snow. It blanket's my world in a pure white. White, like a blank piece of paper. White like the beginning, before there was the color which life brings. All can start anew in the snow. Perhaps that's why I had just snuck out of my dorm room in the middle of the night tonight, the first snow of the year, let the whiteness fall upon me, let the whiteness take me back to the beginning and erase all my deeds. But as soon as the whiteness hit my sleeve it became a beautiful lacey star. Slowly it melted thinner and thinner until it took on it's own form, and I saw that it is different from all the others. It was a life of its own, and I dubbed its as parallel to mine. I believed that each snowflake had a life and a destiny. Each swirl of the wind took it through a turning point in its life, some good, and some bad. I looked down on my snowflake, smiling.  
  
Suddenly a larger stronger looking snowflake came and landed on top of mine. They bonded into one at the touch, like they were falling in love. They now were about to melt into my pink fleece jacket, so I blew them, up into the air where they were swirled by the wind. I blew the two toward the sky and followed them with my eyes all the way to the south, where they drifted out of site.  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
I looked out the window as I listened to the tape again. I couldn't hear Kari tell me she loved me enough.... It was the first snow of the year and I watched the tiny flakes writhe and swirl in the wind. It was so sweet and so pure I pulled on my jacket and walked outside. I watched the snowfall from the north. A little snowflake had a tiny piece of pink fleece in it. It came and landed on my nose. The snow melted and ran down my face. I took the piece of fleece into my hands and rubbed it to my cheek. "I love you too Hikari" I whispered no louder than the wind that carried my message.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
It occurred to me that winter break would be coming in three days. I would be going home. Maybe I'd get a chance to speak to TK. Another good thing. Life was looking up. It hadn't done that in a while...  
  
And sure enough, before I knew it, Izzy and I were boarding the bus to go home. We were both happy to see everyone again, and we chatted merrily about it the whole way back.  
  
When I got off the bus I saw the Izumis and I waved. I saw Tai and Sora and to my great surprise, TK was there too. I ran up to them. Tai and Sora gave me hugs, but then Takeru walked up to me and wowed me with a kiss. I'd forgotten what it was like and now I was just melting. It was like going to heaven and back. He held me tightly. This was the embrace that I had missed so...  
  
"but... I did... and you made... and mph!" I started but his lips cut me off again.  
  
"Hikari, you have some friend you know that?"  
  
"Huh?" I said putting my stuff into the trunk of Tai's car. He took out Kaori's letter, and I read it and looked up shocked. She had taped that conversation...  
  
"I love you Hikari, and I don't care about what happened at that place. The thing's we've done, the people we've kissed they don't matter now, all I know is that I love you, and you love me." I smiled. Finally there was a truth that I liked.  
  
~*~  
  
TK'S POV  
  
Before we knew it we were at her house. We walked in and she looked and she looked around. She beckoned for me (the carrier of the rest of her stuff) to follow her to her room. I put the stuff down and watched her reunite with all her things. "Mr. Snuffs!" she said cuddling her teddy bear, "I missed you yes I did!" I laughed, girls and their stuffed animals...  
  
"Meko! Now you come here! I couldn't have gotten into this school if it wasn't for you!" she called. Meko was only happy to; Kari was the only one who ever really paid attention to him. He climbed into her arms and purred.  
  
"So TK, what have you been up to?" she asked, beckoning for me to join her on the top bunk.  
  
"Umm... let's see..." I gave her sideways smile "My basketball team made it to the playoffs!"  
  
"Kawai! How's school?"  
  
"Particularly nasty."  
  
"How so" she asked, pouting.  
  
"Well, I just handed my term paper in for Biology, and a research paper for History. Right now I have two more days of school in which I have to finish reading "To Kill a Mockingbird"" I made an icky face  
  
"To Kill a Mockingbird"?" She asked "That's one of my favorite books ever! That's great American literature. So different from most of the stuff we read, being in Japan and all."  
  
"You read it then. Tell me all about it." I said  
  
"Nope. It's a literary gem. I will read it WITH you if you'd like." She replied crossing her arms  
  
"How about you read it to me?" I asked climbing up to the top bunk with her. I put my arm around her, and we laid back and looked at the ceiling. She cuddled close to me.  
  
"Okay, but you have to listen." She said tapping me on the nose. "Where are you in the book?"  
  
"Um... The part where the Burris Ewell threatens Miss Caroline." I said realizing how little of the book I had actually read.  
  
"Jeez, we're going to be up all night" I smirked evilly.  
  
"Nope, not until not until they go into the Dubose house." She said in reply to the smirk, and in turn began to grin like an idiot.  
  
(AN: I do not own To Kill a Mockingbird. It was written by. Harper Lee. I'm pretty sure, anyhow. It's been a while since I read it or wrote this. Anyway, I forgot to put that in the disclaimer)  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
"Miss Maudie stared down at me, her lips moving silently. Suddenly she put her hands to her head and whooped. When we left her, she was still chuckling. Jem said he didn't know what was the matter with her- that was just Miss Maudie." I read then looked up.  
  
"Who do you think you resemble the most in the story?" I asked him, quizzing  
  
"The narrator, ya know, the main character." he replied  
  
"You didn't listen to a word I said!" I replied indignantly  
  
"Yes I did! How can somebody not listen to your voice?" He said smiling  
  
"Well then. What's the main character's brother's name."  
  
"Jeb."  
  
"Jem... close"  
  
"Father's name?"  
  
"Aquarius"  
  
"No, it's Atticus. Silly mistakes, but here is the clincher: Why do you compare yourself with Jean Louise Finch?" I asked  
  
"Who's Jean Louise Finch?" he replied  
  
"I told you! You didn't hear a word."  
  
"I was too busy looking at you.," he cooed  
  
"Yeah well..." I said leaning up and giving him a quick kiss. "Mmmm. Jean Louise Finch, not bad let's call it a day!" I said walking out of the bedroom where we had spent the entire afternoon reading. It was time for dinner, and we were going out with all the other Digidestined to plan for the holidays.  
  
"Who's Jean Louise?" He called at me chasing me out the door.  
  
"I'm not telling!" I said. He chased me out the door of the apartment and down the hall. I jumped over anything in my path. He chased me. Finally after hurdling down the steps his long fast legs caught up with me. He grabbed my shirt making my bra straps show. "Takeru!" I yelled. I skidded to a halt. He flew past me and ended up on his butt.  
  
The plan wasn't perfect though because he still held my shirt in his hand and it caused me to fall on top of him. We broke out laughing. "Well then, you'll just have to read the book!" I giggled at him  
  
"'Spose so... You Blue Meany!" He accused  
  
"You remember that?" I marveled  
  
"Yeah! It was the oddest of all the Beatles' movies! Ah... Yellow Submarine."  
  
I laughed gently, "Well, anyway, I'd better change shirts... This is AHEM all stretched out. I wonder AHEM how that could have happened..."  
  
"I know, I can see your bra!" he said as I went to walk away. Suddenly I felt a snap against my back.  
  
"TK!!!!" I screamed I pulled on his ear and kept a grip all the way back up to my apartment. "Ouch!" he said, "You have a firm grip!"  
  
"MUAHAHAHAHA" I cackled wildly walking into my room. I changed shirts and looked myself over, making a face at the mirror. I pulled my hair up into a ponytail. There. I looked all right now.  
  
"C'mon! Tai and Sora will be here any second!" He called  
  
"Coming!" I yelled to him running out the door. I caught up to him, "Oh, Kari, you look beautiful!"  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
We pulled up to the restaurant and walked in. We saw Matt, Mimi, Izzy, Jyou, and Yolie sitting at a table chatting contentedly. Cody walked in right after us.  
  
"Hi all!" Kari said smiling  
  
"Hey!" Jyou called  
  
We took our seats. I sat next to Kari, who sat next to Mimi and across from Sora. I sat next to Matt on the other side, and across from Izzy. .  
  
"So... we're all here... right?" Tai said  
  
"Yes." Sora confirmed  
  
"Forgot me?" Davis said sounding rather cantankerous.  
  
"No." I scoffed, "We didn't invite you."  
  
"Why?" Kari asked looking at me innocently and pulling on my sleeve.  
  
"He tried to break us up... remember?" I replied in a fierce whisper thinking of the less than pleasant memory.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
"What are you talking about TK? Is there something you're not telling me?" I demanded.  
  
"He came to my house and told me you were cheating. He showed me a part of a letter that sounded suggestive of you and what's his face." He said with distaste. "I really want to give him a taste of his own medicine."  
  
~*~  
  
Okay, the next chapter is complete Dai revenging. I'm not sure what I was on when I wrote it, or how I justified it to the story, but I had to leave it in because, oh hell. It's fun. But it's very easy to skip over if you're not up for that sort of thing. 


	4. Davis and the Giant Portapotty

FLF: *Falls over* what kind of drugs birthed this chapter?  
  
Voices: I think you were just that crazy, fur.  
  
FLF: Maybe I was, maybe I was  
  
Alright, here we go. I tell all Davis fans to turn back because this chapter doesn't necessarily bash his personality, but physically emotionally and physiologically hurts him. I hated revising this chapter, but I thought it was far too funny to cut out of the story.  
  
It doesn't really fit in the plot line, so you could probably just head over to the next chapter and never have missed any plot twists or really anything at all.  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
Well, we got home from dinner. All of us came over to Tai and Kari's apartment, all of us minus Davis. I hated him so much. If Kari had chosen him over me, yeah I woulda been bummed out, but I would have wanted her to be happy. I would never have tried to break them up. Davis needed to learn a lesson. I knew that there was no physical equivalent of heartbreak, but I thought that there were some things that could be arranged.  
  
Of course everyone agreed to help me, for some reason or another. In a few cases it was just because they sympathized with Kari and my situation, in others it was because Davis had done something to them that they thought needed punishment too. (Like how he'd gotten pudding on Mimi's $1000 skirt or chewed on Sora's best tennis racket.)  
  
I felt very excited about the whole revenge thing. I could tell Kari was apprehensive, which was very typical of her. She didn't want to hurt Davis. But he'd hurt her, hadn't he? So she agreed, muttering something about how I shouldn't become Heathcliff, but I didn't see the application.  
  
~*~  
  
Davis' POV  
  
Oh... god... long night, last night... today I would go to the fair... that was always fun... I was going alone... Why was everybody so mad at me last night? Especially Kari? And why was she with TK? I thought I had broken them up... It made no sense.  
  
"Oh well," I thought as I put on my jacket, "I can figure it out later." And I head out the door.  
  
"Knock me in and win a prize! Once and you win a small prize! Twice and you win a medium prize! Three times and you win a large prize! Four times and win a Jumbo prize! One shot for only 3 yen! Special offer!" The man sitting on the dunker cried. He must be insane! It's December! The nutter!  
  
I rode the Ferris Wheel- alone. I rode the bumper cars- alone. I had bought lunch and ate it- alone. I thought I saw Sora, Yolie and Mimi, but I was probably just seeing things. They would most likely be out shopping today... I looked back down at my lunch.  
  
After I ate I needed to go to the bathroom... "Oh yeah!" I thought to myself, "It's a fair! Ew... porta-potties... Blah!"  
  
But I had no choice. I opened the door and walked in. I looked down on the thing... I guess it was supposed to be a toilet... Ugh... I pulled down my pants. Suddenly I felt a tug at them and a 'plunk' from below. "SHIT" I yelled my keys had fallen into the... 'Pool' below... I knew I only had one choice.  
  
I had to go in after them. I couldn't get anywhere without them! Even my bike had a lock on it, the one I had ridden here. I couldn't walk home... Oh well! I took the seat off the 'toilet' and put my hand into the 'water' and searched the surface. I felt myself touching other people's crap. Oh god this has just GOTTA be my worst idea yet. Ew.  
  
The whole porta-potty smelled like shit, vomit, diaria, and pee all in one repulsive scent. Suddenly I lost my footing, and having opened the hole in the ground so wide, I fell, head first into the pool of crud. "Oh. My. Fucking. God. IT SMELLS LIKE FUCKING DEVIL SHIT IN HERE!" Well that's probably because it was shit in there. That wasn't the worst part, though. Some had gotten into my mouth. And it was the worst thing ever. I leaned over and nearly puked. It was pitch black, and I was waist deep in waste. I screamed for help, but to no avail. I realized that while in here I should at least look for my keys. I put my hand in and reached around. After about 10 minutes I found them. I yelled for help and eventually, after about 45 minutes, nearly choking to death from the stench, some firemen came and dropped a ladder for me. I smelled like the shit-hole so nobody came near me.  
  
I got home, tracking 'mud' all over the house until I climbed into the shower... Tomorrow would be another day... And people would make fun of me... I mean I fell in a porta-potty... Heh it's kinda funny now... Well not REALLY... but it's important to laugh at yourself... right?  
  
~*~  
  
Sora's POV  
  
"Oh my god Mimi! I can't believe we just did that!" I breathed aloud  
  
"Well it was a PARISIAN outfit he destroyed..." Mimi prodded. We both collapsed laughing. We had simply pulled the keys out of Davis's pocket and plunked them in the water. There was a small hole in the earth... God... we are so evil... I actually feel bad for the little guy. He's kinda like Tai... The prospect of that happening to Tai sent a surge of resentment up my spine, but I shook it off...  
  
"Well part one of revenge is complete!" Yolie said  
  
~*~  
  
Davis' POV  
  
The next day I went to the barber. My hair had grown too long. I walked in and sat down in the chair and waited for him to snip away. I went to the same guy every week. He knew the cut I liked.  
  
"So I heard about you and the port-a-potty. How does one fall in?" Brad, the barber said  
  
"AGH! I dropped my keys in okay? Lay off it!" I retorted  
  
"Okay, sorry!" He continued for about a 1/2 an hour to snip.  
  
"Well there we go!" He turned me away from the mirror. I payed him and thanked him. As I walked through the streets I saw people looking at me funny. I shrugged it off.  
  
When I got home I looked in the mirror. My hair had dried. I yelped. A MULLET! I couldn't believe it... a mullet. I had a mullet... I could never live this down. I had been seen with a mullet. Why would Brad give me a mullet... This was not my week. I would have cut my hair, but my mom only had safety scissors in the house... Something bad had happened to Jun as a child or something, I'd never bothered to ask.  
  
~*~  
  
Matt's POV  
  
"A mullet! Could you think of anything more degrading?" Izzy asked  
  
"I dunno... We could've given him a Tai cut..." I said laughing  
  
"No- the Ringo cut!" Jyou kidded. We all cracked up. We had payed the hair guy to give him a mullet. It was quite funny.  
  
"Well anyway, part two of revenge is completed!" I called  
  
"Prodigious!"  
  
~*~  
  
Davis's POV  
  
I looked down at the little note in my hand, smiling. Things were getting better. My hair was back to normal, I didn't smell funny anymore and I had a note from Kari.  
  
__________________________________________________________________  
  
Dear Davis, I know you've had a... rough... to say the least... week. I was hoping to make it up to you. Come over to my place tomorrow. We have chocolate! Well ta!  
  
Winks,  
  
Kari Kamiya ___________________________________________________________________  
  
I walked up to her door and knocked. "Hey Davis, come on in!" I heard her sweet voice say  
  
"Sup??" I asked  
  
"Nothing really. I might go to the fair... Was it fun?" She asked  
  
"Not funny." I replied  
  
"Sorry" she giggled  
  
TK walked in. He gave me a chocolate bar, one to Kari and kept one for himself. I scarfed mine down. I loved chocolate.  
  
"C'mon let's watch some TV!" Kari called  
  
We all sat down and turned on the TV. It was a re-run of the American show Friends. I watched for a minute or two. Oh, smelly cat. What are they feeding you? As the show ended I realized that I had to get to a bathroom.  
  
"Uh... Kari do you have another bathroom?" I asked because TK had excused himself a minute earlier and the door was locked.  
  
"Only one, but TK'll come out if you apologize to him." She said  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"God you ARE slow! Just walk up to the door and say that you're sorry for trying to break us up!" she said. So I did so. I walked up and said I was sorry.  
  
"And?"  
  
"I'd... I'd... do it again!" I said. I wouldn't give Kari up without a good go-round!  
  
"Learn the hard way." He said opening the door and letting me in. It turned out that I was right. It was the chocolate. It was exlax chocolate, and a little bit of that stuff goes a long way... Too much causes diaria and vomiting. All unpleasantness. After an hour I finally felt good enough to leave the room. I walked out. Kari walked in and grabbed something. It was a little video camera.  
  
"Davis. This is exactly what you think it is. Blackmail tape. I would be more than happy to share this to the world. Okay? Now promise you'll never try to break TK and I up again." Kari said her arms folded, somehow her voice still sounding sweet.  
  
"Uhuh." I whimpered  
  
"In writing." TK said handing me a piece of paper  
  
___________________________________________________________  
  
I, Daisuke solemnly swear never to:  
  
*Try to break Takeru Takaishi and Hikari Kamiya up.  
  
*Look at Hikari in any way I wouldn't look at my grandmother  
  
*Use exlax chocolate as revenge onto Takeru and Hikari  
  
*Ever get a mullet EVER again  
  
*Get dirt on Mimi's PARISIAN outfit  
  
*Bite Sora's tennis equipment  
  
*Ever mention this to the outside world  
  
X____________________________  
  
_____________________________________________________________  
  
I signed  
  
"Now let's watch some more TV." Kari said and we sat back down on the couch. Kari sat in HIS arms. I would just have to live with it...  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
I felt bad for the guy. We had put him through hell. He put us through it first... Anyway, I have to leave in a few days, so I'm gonna get in my last few days with TK before then... I looked up at him and smiled he must love me if he'd do this for me. He really was the best....  
  
~*~ ~*~  
  
FLF: ...oi vey. Okay, quick detour. Drama picks up again next time, so read on, read on. 


	5. The Pizza Boy Told Me So

FLF: well, well, well. Here we are.  
  
Voices: Us too.  
  
FLF: And this chap is all new, sweet thang. So enjoy!  
  
Voices: Or in other words, drink a hellish amount of that strong stuff until Fur's writing looks like she has talent that you could enjoy.  
  
FLF: Or you could just smoke until you got there. Anyway, I want you to like this, Damnit! So grab that sweet stuff.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own much in this little old world, but for sure I don't own Digimon.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
I rested in TK's arms and pretended to watch what was on TV. I felt his heart beat. I felt his breath on my forehead. I felt love again. I felt good. There were three more days until I would go back to school, and I wasn't sure whether to dread or not, but it didn't matter. Right now I had to enjoy every second of TK holding me close. I smiled, when I did go back to school the letters would come again, the poems too. He would make sure that no matter where I was I would be surrounded by his love, and this time I would do that too.  
  
I smiled softly as he placed a kiss between my eyes, and pulled me closer. I gently fingered at my necklace. A light chain held the promise ring TK had given me for Christmas, a thin white gold band that twisted at the top where a small pink sapphire was beautifully faceted. He must have saved for some time to get me such a beautiful gift. I had been speechless when I opened up the box, just as he had been when I gave him my gift. It had been a picture I painted right before break, the two of us dancing, the background- hazy. He'd loved it and I'd helped him hang it in his room. At this moment, right here, lying in his arms I felt I was at an apex. I could tell when I looked him in the eye that he felt it too. Love, life, everything could get any better than it was at this very moment. I knew it full well. Only right then did it occur to me, as it always does when you stand at a mountain's peak, that the only way to go was down.  
  
"Ding-dong, Ding-dong." Chimed the doorbell. I went up to answer it; I knew that it was the pizza guy. We'd ordered about twenty minutes ago because TK and I were staying in tonight and watching some old movies. It would be nice just to spend some time alone, away from the other Digidestined, so I'd treated Tai and Sora to dinner to get them out of the house. TK couldn't have been happier with the idea.  
  
"Ben?" I cried in complete shock as I opened the door, "You're a pizza guy?"  
  
"Not Ben." replied the boy who had a strong American accent, "I'm his twin brother. I'm Logan." He looked me over, "And you're the girl from on TV! Man, Ben told me you were hot, but damn..."  
  
"Um, thank you?" I replied awkwardly, fiddling with an earring. I couldn't think of anything to say to fill the awkward silence, "Can I have my pizza, now?" I finally asked waving some money out in front of his face. He grabbed the money and handed me the pizza.  
  
"Thank you," He said  
  
"Have a nice evening." I replied, shutting the door. But he stopped it and grabbed me by the arm.  
  
"So why isn't my brother good enough for you, huh?" He hissed  
  
"It's not that he's not good eno." I began, but he cut me off  
  
"What is he not good looking enough for you?" his voice was sharp and quick  
  
"No, it's not that."  
  
"Not smart enough?"  
  
"I know he's smart, but I."  
  
"Is he not a good enough artist? Not. what, girl? What the hell's wrong with my brother that you have to go hurt him so bad?"  
  
"Nothing is wrong with your brother! If you'd let me talk I'd."  
  
"If nothing is wrong with my brother," he sneered, "Then why has he been sulking around this entire vacation? Tell me that? Why has he been a sniveling mess? Why? Why wasn't he good enough for you? Why did you have to go and break his heart?"  
  
"I. I have a. boyfriend. and. he." I began to cry. Why did everything always end up such a mess? I hadn't ever intended to hurt Ben, I just had needed TK back and. I guess I wasn't really thinking about his feelings. What had I done? I looked up to find Logan walking down the hall.  
  
"Wait!" I called after him "Tell Ben I'm sorry!" but I don't think he ever heard me.  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
When Kari walked back into the apartment with the pizza I knew that something was very wrong. I tried to ask her, but she just shook her head. I thought that we'd worked everything out, what was wrong with her now? Just when everything was so perfect, why was she in such a funk? I sighed. I figured that there wasn't very much that I could do at the moment except get her a piece of pizza and wait for her to calm down. And sure enough ten minutes later with a mouth full of pizza, Kari spoke.  
  
"It was Ben's brother."  
  
"The pizza guy?" I asked her, puzzled  
  
"Yeah, at first I thought it was Ben himself, they're twins."  
  
"What'd he do?"  
  
"He didn't do anything. But he said." her voice trailed off.  
  
"What?"  
  
"He said that Ben's not okay, that he's been a mess all break. He says I broke his heart." Kari looked at me through bleary eyes, "I didn't mean to."  
  
"I know," I reassured  
  
"I just wanted you back, and. God, I was so angry, I just didn't think."  
  
"Shhh." I whispered to Kari who was sobbing into my chest. "You'll tell him that when you get back to school. But right now we have the whole night ahead of us, so I suggest that you calm down and make the most of it. Okay?" I asked lifting her chin so that she met my eyes.  
  
"Okay." She said and leaned over to give me a kiss. "We'll have a nice evening."  
  
But the night just wasn't nearly the same as it should have been.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
I hopped on the bus to school after getting a nice long goodbye kiss from TK. I put my things in the overhead compartment and took the window seat that Izzy had saved for me. All the way up we talked about my situation. Izzy was so mature. He knew just how to deal with everything and he made me feel very at ease. He told me that all I needed to do was tell the truth and everything would turn out all right. He said that if ever anything did go wrong that he would be there for me, no matter what. And I hoped with my whole heart that this was the truth.  
  
When we climbed off the bus and walked into the main hall of HSA, the first thing I remember was being tackled by Hanae and then listening to her long detailed descriptions of some guy that she met over break. He was supposedly the son of a rich doctor, and very good-looking. She said that he was smart and funny and I smiled when she said that she wanted to marry him. I told her about how everything had worked out with TK. My eyes were scanning the room to see if I could find Kaori, and just when I thought I had, I heard a deep voice from behind me call out my name.  
  
"Ben?" I asked as I whirled around. He flashed me a quick smile. I watched Hanae wink at me as she disappeared into the crowd of students.  
  
"So I heard that you met my brother." He said with a smirk, but I saw that his eyes were indeed sad.  
  
"Yes, yes I did." I replied, "Look, Ben? I really need to talk to you. There's some stuff I need to say."  
  
"I thought you already dealt with that before break." He replied coolly.  
  
"No, you deserve me to be calm. I want you to understand some things."  
  
"Alright," he pulled over a couple chairs for us to sit on. "What did you wanna say?"  
  
"I'm sorry," I began and looked into his sad eyes, "I didn't mean to hurt you, you can't even begin to imagine what I was going through. Well maybe you can. Oh God. Look, don't hate me. I know that you don't want to hear excuses, because there is no excuse for how I blew up at you. How I humiliated you. I knew you liked me, I just didn't feel like dealing with it until it was too late. I didn't know that you didn't know that I had a boyfriend. I just wanted to be your friend because you are smart and funny and artistic and. I just want to be friends. Do you think that we could be friends, Ben?"  
  
"I dunno, Kari. Not yet. Is that okay?"  
  
"Yeah, I guess so."  
  
"Look, just give me some time,"  
  
"You don't hate me?" I asked him  
  
"I could never hate you," he replied, "It's just hard right now."  
  
"Okay. I'll see you around then."  
  
"Yeah, see ya." He replied.  
  
Something about the way he just stood there, so unsure of what he'd just said made me feel so terrible that I couldn't help but tear at the thought. Before I knew it was running back to give him a hug. After a minute, the shock wore off and he pushed me away. He gave me an angry look and yelled, "Go."  
  
I ran blindly up the stairway intending to go to my dorm room but when Kaori wasn't there yet I moved on. I needed to talk to someone. I rushed through the hallways bumping into people until I made it to where I was going. I knocked on the door.  
  
"Kari," Izzy spoke softly, as he invited me into his room to sit down. "What's the matter?" And I told him how I told Ben the truth, how he didn't want to be my friend anymore. And how I'd just hugged him, and how I'd wanted to just keep hugging him. I told Izzy about how Ben had fumed at me, and how confused I was because I should only want to be in TK's arms.  
  
Izzy shushed me and took me into his arms and rocked me back and forth as I cried. He told me that it was okay. He said it was simply my nature to want to make everyone happy and that's why I hugged Ben. He said that love was confusing, but that if he'd ever seen true love it was the love that TK and I shared. I wiped my eyes with my sleeve and smiled up at him.  
  
"Thank you," I whispered, "You always know how to make things okay, Izz."  
  
"Anytime, Kari. You know you can always come to me if you need anything."  
  
"You too, Izzy, you too." And with that I walked out the door. I had some important letters to write and they simply couldn't be put off.  
  
~*~  
  
Dear Ben,  
  
I'm sorry that I keep messing everything up... I swear I don't mean to. But I don't think things can get better until you let me be your friend. I need to move forward and get over this gap up ahead, but your friendship is the bridge that will take me to the other side.  
  
I know that you must think that I'm horribly screwed up, but I'm not. I'm just confused. It's really weird for me right now, but I'm sure that if you build that bridge for me, what's on the other side is a wonderful friendship.  
  
Sincerely,  
  
Hikari Kamiya.  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
A couple days after school started I got a letter from Kari. I smiled. She must have written this as soon as she got there. I missed her already.  
  
I hastily opened it up, to find her normal perfect handwriting in sweet pink ink. But I just couldn't believe what it said.  
  
~*~ ~*~  
  
Uh-oh. What did it say??? 


	6. So, who's the girl?

FLF: Okay, chapter six  
  
Voices: This is new. Yay.  
  
FLF: Newness rocks.  
  
Voices: So what's new with you?  
  
FLF: An A in math, you best believe  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the Digidestined, but the rest of the story is pretty much mine. I think? Dunno. It feels like mine, but then so does this computer and we've had that debate.  
  
Voices: Yes, yes we have fur.  
  
~*~  
  
~*~  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
I was completely confused by the letter that I held in my hand. Why would Kari send me this? What was she talking about? I read the words one more time.  
  
So TK, who's the girl?  
  
-Kari  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
I was astounded that I hadn't noticed it before, how blind I'd been! "The things we've done, the people we've kissed." TK had said. Well I'd come clean, but he surely hadn't. He'd been right, it was time to move on, but you can't move on from something you'd never known. I couldn't believe he'd cheated and never told me. But then. what proof did I have? Maybe he wasn't cheating and I'd just jumped to conclusions as quickly as I'd jumped out of Izzy's room that night. Words had raced through my head, begging to be heard, written, read.  
  
I regretted the bluntness of the letter; it must have given TK some jolt if he hadn't actually done what I thought. But I felt so sure, remembering the way he'd spoken to me. I frowned, I didn't even know if I was angry. I was so confused. I climbed up into my bed and fell asleep.  
  
The next day classes begun, I was glad to have some time to just paint what I felt so 'freedom of the brush' was even nicer than usual for me. Afterward I felt a little better, enough that I could work up the courage to check my mail. Before I'd been too afraid, not wanting to read anything I'd get from TK. I walked up to the main office where the students had their post boxes and emptied mine into my hand. Sure enough, there was a letter from TK. My heart throbbed. I couldn't wait to open it, yet I dreaded it with my whole heart. I began to tear at the edges as I felt a tap on my shoulder. I took a deep breath and turned around.  
  
"Kari?" Ben asked sheepishly as he saw my frustrated expression.  
  
"Yes?" I replied, biting my lower lip.  
  
"Look I just wanted to let you know." He began, looking me straight in the eye and speaking gently, "that I'm not mad and I don't think you're crazy. I know it wasn't your fault that you hurt me. And I think I'm ready to be your friend."  
  
I smiled up at him, almost forgetting the letter, "Thanks. You know, your friendship means a lot to me."  
  
"I'm glad," He spoke, he looked me over and his voice was lined with genuine worry, "Are you alright?"  
  
"Sure." I replied, but his expression didn't change. "No, you know what? Actually, I'm not alright."  
  
"Do you. wanna talk about it?" He asked. I nodded and led him to my room. I opened the door to find a note from Kaori, which said that she'd be playing basketball in the gym right now, but if I needed to talk about anything I could catch her at dinner. I sighed and climbed up to my top bunk, motioning for Ben to follow. He looked uncomfortable as he sat there with me, but I reassured him that this was normal- we were friends.  
  
"So what is it?" he asked, watching me with concern  
  
"It's this." I said holding up the letter, "When I went back home for break my boyfriend TK and I had the best time. Do you remember," I shifted uncomfortably, "When I told you off in the hallway that day? Well Kaori recorded what I said and sent it to him. So when I came home he'd forgiven me. Everything was just perfect, it was fun and exciting. we were at an apex, you know? Things couldn't get better, they could only get worse."  
  
"And that's when my brother came to deliver a pizza."  
  
"Yes. I felt so bad that I snapped to reality, like I'd been on some sort of cloud. And once I fell off I just couldn't get back on. When I got here I was. confused and lost. Something in the back of my mind had been torturing me and I'd just kept pushing it back. You know how that is?"  
  
"Yeah,"  
  
"And I saw you and you looked. Tortured. I don't know why, I think maybe that's self important of me to say, but you did. And I finally let this little thing at the back of my mind creep to the forefront. And I needed comfort. and so I ran to you, but I took you for granted and you sent me away and. That night I wrote two letters. You got yours, and now you're here. And TK got his. And this is his response."  
  
"I think you left something out. You never told me what was at the back of your mind." He began; I could tell he was excited, wondering if maybe I'd been harboring feelings for him. I sighed.  
  
"Oh. Right. Well, I guess that's even the most important part." I started again, clearing my throat. "Right when I got back and he ran up to greet me, I went to apologize. He cut me off though, and he said something along the lines of 'it doesn't matter who we kissed because we're together now'. And I realized that he was hiding something from me. I didn't mean to overreact. But it's really hard to own up to your actions, you know?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"And I had. Completely. I never denied that I. enjoyed the kiss." I began, blushing and finding myself unable to meet his gaze, "I never denied that I kissed you back. I never blamed it on you or any of the other things that I could have done to make the ordeal easier for me. I told him the whole entire truth. And he didn't tell me any of it." I was beginning to get upset, and he could tell.  
  
"Shhh. It's alright to be upset, Kari, I know this has been hard for you, but maybe. Maybe you're jumping to conclusions."  
  
"Well that's what I'm about to find out." I said as I tore open the letter, heart pounding like crazy, head spinning, Ben took my hand as I read what it said.  
  
Dear Kari,  
  
Her name is Marie. I swear it's not like you think. She's not a boy snatcher. She's sweet and kind and. she had a crush on me. It was innocent and pure like your Ben. And so we became friends and when I got that letter from Davis and when I saw what happened on TV. She was there for me. And she hugged me and told me that everything would be okay. I don't know. it was comfort, free and simple. We kissed maybe twice. No more. I don't know why I didn't tell you about her. I guess things were finally going just right with us and I didn't want to change them. I'm sorry. I feel terrible. And she's a wreck. She doesn't want to cause trouble. I told her that there would be no trouble. I hope that I'm right, Kari.  
  
Love always,  
  
TK  
  
I looked up at Ben, frowning, "What do I do with this?" I cried  
  
"You forgive him." He replied, "He forgave you. He just wants things to be right, so forgive him."  
  
I was moved by Ben's words: after all of this I'd made a true friend. He was selfless with his advice, I could tell that he didn't want to say these words, but knew that they were the proper advice. I knew that they were the proper advice. But that didn't matter. "I don't. I don't want to. I don't want to forgive him." I whispered.  
  
"Then take some time to calm down."  
  
"That sounds like a good idea. I just need to talk this out."  
  
"Listen, this is just my advice, you have to deal with it however you see fit. The last decision is yours. But I'm always here to help" He said. I smiled sadly at him.  
  
"Thank you, but I think I've talked you out for now. I'll see you at dinner in a little while."  
  
"Alright," He said climbing down from the top bunk, "Goodbye, Kari."  
  
"Bye," I said, giggling slightly as Kaori burst through the door, sweaty and flushed, bumping into Ben. Kaori was terribly embarrassed as she apologized, but Ben just smiled and walked out the door.  
  
~*~  
  
After Ben left, I gave Kaori the letter to read. After she was finished she said that she needed to think before dispensing any thought gems. So I told her to go take a shower. I said that we could talk after dinner.  
  
I walked down the hall with the letter crumpled in my pocket. I felt slightly like a cancer patient taking as many opinions as I could because I wasn't really ready to see the truth. I stood at Izzy's door, wanting more than anything to hear his calm voice smooth through all of my problems like a comb. But instead I stopped to listen to voices through the walls.  
  
"What is it with you, lately? You never had problems with exclusivity before, now all the sudden it's every time we talk, or kiss or are even near each other, God, Izzy make up your mind, what do you want us to be?" Yelled a female voice  
  
"I want us to be. both?" I heard Izzy reply weakly  
  
"We can't be both. Look Damnit, as far as I see it, either we are or we're not. I don't even know if I want to be a part of this anymore. I won't just be your booty call at three in the morning, because you drag emotion into it. And I can't just be your girlfriend because you can't make up your mind. So choose, Izzy. Relationships need order and definition to survive, so what are we?"  
  
"Why can't we be both?"  
  
"It's one or nothing." She said firmly.  
  
"Fine." He replied, still calm  
  
"Fine. So what will it be?"  
  
"Right now neither choice is right for me, so I guess I have to choose nothing."  
  
"Okay!" screamed the girl, "If that's how it's going to be, then goodbye Izzy." I could hear her beginning to cry. "Look, I just wanted to be a good girlfriend. I'm sorry if that's not good enough for you. There's only so much I can give." And with that, I watched a tall blonde girl dash from the room where I'd been standing, but not before slapping my friend hard across the face. Normally I would have said something, but I got this feeling that she'd the right.  
  
I was shocked. I didn't understand at all. What was going on? Izzy knew how to handle any situation. He was good with those things. But here he was acting. strange. Selfish. And for some strange reason I was outraged.  
  
I looked at him in awe as he rubbed his sore cheek, "Kari," he began weakly, "I can explain the situation."  
  
"I don't want you to. I came for some advice. Maybe it's a bad time. I'll talk to you later." I turned around trying to hide my anger, but he grabbed me by the arm, and looked me straight in the eye. I saw pain and sadness reflecting there, and I softened.  
  
"Wait. I really need a friend right now." And soon enough I was sitting on the floor of his dorm room spilling my heart out.  
  
"And I really don't want to forgive him." I finished, feeling very silly bringing my problems to the spotlight when Izzy was the one who clearly needed to get something off his chest. But he hadn't really wanted to talk.  
  
"It's because you think it might happen again. But I don't think it will, Kar. You are the fourth leaf to his clover. He was hurt, don't hurt him and I don't think history will repeat itself. Exclusivity is hard, Kar. Look at you two, miles away and you're making it, it's a struggle, but you're doing it all right. Look at me and Lin, we live in the same building, for crying out loud, and we can't do it. You two are in love. And." Izzy began to cry, "I've never been in love."  
  
I must have looked terribly confused because he spoke up, "You follow your heart, Kar, that's good. I never have. Just follow your heart, what does it tell you to do?"  
  
And so I leaned over and gave him a kiss.  
  
~*~  
  
~*~  
  
~*~  
  
Oh. My god. I just did that, yes I did. But it's not like it means anything with my Takari inclination.  
  
But if it irks you so, or tickles you the best thing to do is just review. 


	7. You Don't Think With Your Heart

FLF: here's chapter 7.  
  
Voices: 7. What a big number. I don't know how people can actually read seven chapters of this fic.  
  
FLF: It's nice when they review though. Wink. Wink.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon or any of its characters. But I'm thinking maybe I could own some of their angst.  
  
  
  
~*~  
  
Izzy's POV  
  
I couldn't even begin to deal with all of the emotions whizzing through my head and heart before Kari had kissed me. Needless to say the kiss messed me up even more. What on earth did she think she was doing? I wanted to ask her. . . but then, it wasn't every day that a pretty girl like Kari surprised me with kisses, so I didn't pull away. Pretty girls like Kari normally go after hot jocks like TK. TK. . . What kind of friend was I? I was letting him down. I was letting Kari down. And then my mind wandered back a half an hour to the other beautiful girl I'd let down. . . The typical teenage male in me didn't want to pull away, but my own ethics overcame and I managed to do so.  
  
I clutched Kari's shoulders with my cold shaking hands, she looked up at me through tear glazed eyes, clearly terrified. I let her go, and she fell to a lump on the floor. We just sort of sat there for a while, lost in our own little worlds of thought.  
  
"Kari?" I asked gently, lifting her chin with my index finger so that her puffy red eyes met with mine.  
  
"Yes." she whispered in reply  
  
"That wasn't what your heart told you to do, was it?"  
  
"I thought."  
  
"Thinking is with your head, Kari. I mean really. . . Really Kari. Tell the truth. Did that. . . that kiss. . . Did it feel right to you?"  
  
She paused for a moment gauging whether or not she was about to hurt my feelings, eventually deciding that it didn't matter.  
  
"No, it was wrong, Izz. You know it was wrong." Her voice stopped and she looked up at me, I must have looked slightly disappointed, and amidst my confusion maybe I was, because then she said, giving me a very slight sheepish smile, "But just because it didn't feel right. . . didn't mean that it was bad."  
  
I laughed gently, "Oh, Kari. What am I going to do with you?" I took her hand into mine and began to play with her fingers like she was a little child. I pulled her close to me and whispered, "I won't tell anyone if you don't want me too, we can let this whole thing be a secret."  
  
Kari looked thoughtful for a moment, I was surprised that she was actually considering this, but I was not at all shocked when she gave me a cold flat, "No. TK's gotta know what's going on." That was the Kari I knew talking. She was back.  
  
"Alright," I whispered softly, "But maybe. . . Maybe we could hold off telling Tai?"  
  
"Oh yeah, Tai's gonna kick your ass!" Kari was laughing, but I didn't think it was all that much of a laughing matter.  
  
"Well what are you going to tell TK?" I snapped. Kari's giggle fit stopped immediately. I felt bad, it was kinda nice to hear her laughing.  
  
"The truth I guess." She replied shakily.  
  
"What is the truth Kari? I'm dying to know. Why did you kiss me?"  
  
And I looked into her trembling amber eyes and she cut away from my gaze and ran out the door. I sighed as I picked up the phone to call the first girl who'd run out of my room that day. I frowned. All these ins and outs and ups and downs were making me dizzy. I began to laugh, Dizzy Izzy. How had I not seen that before? But I was soon sobered as I heard the person on the other end speak "Hello." And I found myself too confused to reply.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
What was I going to tell TK? Why had I kissed Izzy? Why hadn't I just written "I forgive you, TK" even if I hadn't meant it? Why did I have to drag this messed up soap opera on and on? I decided that I just needed to think by myself for a while.  
  
Dear TK. I took the paper into my hands and tossed it over my shoulder.  
  
I had begun the letters two hours ago. But this was all I'd written. Drafts and drafts lay crumpled on the floor. Dear Takeru. Dear Teeks, Dear Keru, Dear Tiki, Dear my dear, Dear Takeru, love . . . This was as far as I'd gotten and about as far as I thought I would get that night. I didn't want this right now. I wanted someone to hug me and kiss me and tell me everything was alright. Yes, I thought to myself, that was exactly what I needed! That was exactly what I'd always needed! Ever since my journey to the dark ocean when I'd suddenly seen the reason to stop bottling I'd run to TK's arms. . .  
  
I picked up the pen.  
  
~*~  
  
TK's POV  
  
I couldn't wait to get out of school that day. Today would be the day; I could feel it in my bones. Today I'd get a letter from Kari. I just wondered what it would say. As the bell rang for last period I was first out the door. I didn't bother to get the homework, I just ran home. I climbed the stairs to my apartment, the elevator wasn't coming quick enough. I walked inside and looked onto the table. Sure enough in a pretty pink pen I saw an envelope with my name on it.  
  
Dear TK,  
  
I love you. You know that, don't you? God, TK. If I could be anywhere right now it would be in your arms. Do you remember, well I guess it's kinda hard to forget, when I used to get stuck in the dark ocean? It was because I used to bottle things. Well after that I was very forthright about my feelings. Remember how I always used to come to you? And you'd hold me in your arms and tell me what I should do. Remember that? Well, I do. Everything is on a whole new level now, TK. Love adds depth to pain.  
  
Do you know how hard it was for me to stop bottling? It was damn near impossible! But I did, I stopped bottling. I told you EVERYTHING. I came clean about EVERYTHING. Even things about Ben. I owned up to my actions. And when I found out that you hadn't, oh God. I was so furious! Because you probably would never have told me. I understand why, I do now, but I was just hysterical then. And what do I do when I'm upset? I run to you, you hold me close and tell me what to do.  
  
But you weren't there. And this ran too deep for a hug and an advising. So I kissed Izzy. There. I came clean again. I'm sorry TK. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. If I could take it back, I would. I love YOU TK. It was a moment and I thought it was the right thing to do. But it wasn't, I was just confused. I think. . . I think I wanted you to feel that pain too. And that was very selfish of me, TK. And I'm sorry. I forgive you a million times over. I forgive you forever. But please, you just gotta forgive me! Now that I'm thinking straight all I wanna do is put the past in the past and move on together.  
  
Can we try?  
  
Love always,  
  
Hikari Kamiya.  
  
~*~  
  
Kari's POV  
  
My fingers were trembling and icy. I looked up at the ceiling, knowing full well that I had to open this letter, but I didn't want to. I wanted to leave it with me doing the right thing, and that being it. But I did what had to be done.  
  
Dear Kari,  
  
This is all so ridiculous! Honestly, if I knew that it would be this difficult to be with you, I would have never fallen for you in the first place. But I did, and I fell too hard. So Kari, yes, I understand what it's like to be confused.  
  
Kari, I'm not mad at you. I love you way too much. And I think that every last bit of this mess has been cleaned up and gone over again. I don't think I could be mad! So let's just move forward, how does that sound? Good? I know. I think it's time we had some real clean happiness again.  
  
As for Izzy. . . I don't think I know exactly what to say. Maybe I'll just let it be that he has good taste. I'm so tired of anger, I think I'll let Tai whoop his ass for me. Make him a very Dizzy Izzy.  
  
Love you always,  
  
TK  
  
PS: I've got a very special surprise for you on the 13th! Wait for it!  
  
I smiled and read the letter again. This was all too easy, I thought, but then again, this had been way too difficult for way too long, so thank God it was easy now! All I could wonder was what was happening on the 13th. . . And whether I could persuade Tai that I had been the one kissing Izzy.  
  
But that all seemed so easy now that TK and I were cool again. He had that calming effect. It was just one of the many things I loved about him.  
  
~*~  
  
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I fixed it! Yay. Review and show your appreciation to me! haha. 


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